The Best Day of My Life!

I kept grandkids this past week, well I know Sunday starts a new week but I kept Mallory and Emily Sunday. They went to Sunday School with me and then we went to eat at CiCi's Pizza, (big mistake) what a mess, well, with Emily not so much with Mallory. They both wanted pepperoni pizza and then they both picked the pepperoni off the pizza and ate plain cheese pizza. I had asked them if they wanted cheese pizza and of course "NO, we want pepperoni!" Go figure, anyway, feeding my grandkids is my least favorite thing to do with them EVER! After lunch I was kind of out of sorts because of the lunch mess and of course we had planned on swimming in the afternoon. We ended up of course having a great time in the pool. Last year at the end of the swimming season they were both unafraid of the water and Mallory was swimming without a life jacket, and Emily was jumping off the side of the pool and swimming (in her floatie swimsuit) back to the steps to do it all over again. This was a new season and they had to get used to it all over again and they had a great time. I don't think Mallory has been to our house in the past 6 months that she didn't tell me about something else she had done and she always ends the story with, "That was the BEST day of my life!" When she left our house Sunday, she told me, "This was the Best day of my life!" Grouchy ole Grammy thought to herself, and said out loud, "Oh, Mallory! you say that about everyday." After she left and all day today, I have thought to myself what a great habit it would be to think everyday you spent was the BEST day of your life! Wouldn't we all be in better mental health if we could adopt that attitude? If God blesses us with the ability to be healthy enough to get up in the morning, mow grass, drive a car, go to the grocery store, visit with friends, clean our houses, take care of all the blessings God has given us, shouldn't every day be the BEST day EVER?! From the mouths of babes comes a truth that we should all embrace. May you always be such a positive thinker Miss Mallory! Love you!

Play Day

Today after Bible Study I went to eat with some friends and then headed to Ridgmar Mall to meet my daughter-in-law and pick up my grandson, Ian. He spent the night with me last night. I had been out of town for a few days and had missed getting to see him, so I opted for a sleepover. I can honestly say I had a blast with him. He has a little bit of a disability called Sensory Integration Disorder and my son and his wife have been working with therapists to get his speech on track and up to speed. He has just had 3 sessions and I would like to commend therapists and mom and dad on the great progress he has made in just a few weeks. First of all I would like to say there is nothing wrong with his intelligence it is just hard for him to process some things and gets flustered easily. He also has a little OCD and doesn't like getting his hands in dirt or anything sticking to them, like food or dirt or grass, so I bought him a little play station where one side is for sand and the other side for water play. It was a great success and he played with it for well over an hour without losing interest. Next we got in the pool and he jumped off the side of the pool to me and I pulled him through the water as he kicked his little chubby legs. I pushed him in the pool float until he almost fell asleep, we got out came in the house, he would not take a nap so he watched Toy Story all the way through with his blanket and frog pillow, repeating some of the lines of the movie to my great delight. We played on the neighbors swingset after supper, had races in the backyard and then a bath and to bed around 9pm. I can honestly tell you my heart is totally out in the open, none of it held back where this child is concerned. I love him with all of my being and would do anything for him. He is my first grandson and a great blessing from God to me and I am so thankful for the time we spent together, for his sweet voice as he makes animal sounds, and says or sings his ABC's. One of the great strides he made that I had noticed is that he wore his cowboy hat for at least 5 minutes. That is a huge step as he doesn't want anything touching his head, part of the sensory disorder. I got the pictures to prove it and here they are, my little thumb sucking cowboy. Now isn't that precious?!

A Blast from My Past

I have just returned home today after spending 4 days and nights in my former home town, Snyder TX. I was dreading going because there are still so many memories there that really tear at my heart. Snyder is where I was born and lived until age 10, moved back in 1982 and reared both my children there, both of them going all the way through the public school system in that one town, playing ball, learning about life, music and everything in between. My youngest son was brought home from the hospital to the house we built and lived in until I moved in 2002. We attended Calvary Baptist Church the whole time we were there and it is still home to me. I moved there in 1982 after my dad had passed away suddenly and left my mother a widow at the age of 53. I am older than that now and I can't imagine her living alone all those years until her death at age 74. Memories just flooded my mind the whole time I was there. Memories of people, places and conversations, activities, work, church and the busyness of life. There were memories even of food and we had to eat at all my favorite old places, except for one, Lota Burger, which is long gone, and everyone still misses it. I can still smell it and imagine the taste which nothing else even compares to. Yes, life goes on, people change, people don't change, the finality of memories and the frustration they bring makes it hard to go back and face those memories sometimes, but sometimes, you get a glimpse of a child playing in the backyard, making a good play during a game, first black eye, first piano recitals, solos, broken hearts, girlfriends, graduations and decisions that will affect you and and everyone around you for eternity. Sometimes I want so badly to go back and request a do over with the knowledge I have now, but that will never be a possibility and I am thankful for the blessed memories I have of my mom and my boys without knowing at the time what the future would hold for all of us. I would do well to remember that fact when I want so badly to know the outcome of the future.

Mother's Day 2010

Actually mother's day has come and gone. A day that was meant to honor mom truly for some of us brings much anxiety and tension. When a mom and a child are at odds with one another, Mother's day brings hope to the mother that the child will at least call, share some kind words of thanks for loving me, taking care of me, giving me life, standing by me when all others won't, you know that kind of thing that only a mother would think a child might say. I went to lunch with my girlfriends from church today and one of the other moms said she was so relieved that mother's day was over. It brought a week of hoping her son would call, even though she really didn't hold out much hope. Even though she had one child with her that day, she was sad that the other child wasn't there also. Just like my friend I had one of our sons with me, mine was ever thoughtful, the oldest child, and as always had a card for me with hand written words expressing his appreciation for me. It was priceless to me and I was so thankful to have him and his family with me on that day. Like my friend we know we won't get the response from the other child that we so hope for, but because we are mother's we never stop loving them and hoping one day things will be different and we know Monday morning we can put Mother's Day behind us for another year and look ahead to future with hope that next year may be different.

I have been reading a book called Tending Roses. It is about an elderly grandmother that still lives on the homeplace but is getting unable to live alone and her granddaughter and her husband and 4 month old son are staying with her a few weeks before the rest of the family comes to put her in a nursing home. The granddaughter gets to know her sometimes crotchety old grandmother in a way she has never known her before, partly because of her grandmother's diary that she comes upon from time to time. One of the entries in the diary was about the grandmother as a new bride before she had children. She had come into her marriage with nothing, no dowry, extremely poor but her husband understood she needed something to call her own and he gave her the space and time to grow a rose garden even though on a farm there was always work to be done, he provided this respite for her. Her roses were beautiful and she tended them well, but as her children came along she had to leave the garden and let the roses grow wild. When her children were all grown and her husband had passed away she started tending her rose garden once again and once again it was beautiful, but she realized that her life was most fulfilling when she didn't have time to tend the roses and they just grew wild. Young mothers please know that this will be one of the most precious times of your life. Take time out of your day to make their life fun, play with them when they need a playmate, enjoy their neediness of you and your time because there will come a time when the house is silent, and they no longer are needy of your time and you will long for their voice and the sharing of their day with you.

I look back and like any mother have regrets for the way I handled some things, maybe a lot of things, but I also know that with all my heart I tried diligently to bring up my boys in a way that would be pleasing to the Lord. I can honestly say I did the best I knew how to as far as bringing up children. I had too many days when I was stressed over money and bills, but I also had days when I played games with them and we went outside and played baseball or I watched them swim or jump on the trampoline. There were days we rode bikes and walked down the dirt road and walked down to Granny's house to see her garden or just say hell-o or have Sunday dinner at her house. YUMMM! We all still miss those meals! Those were all precious days and like any mother I miss them but I am so blessed to have my son come home on mother's day with his family and I cherish the time I will have with his children knowing how quickly the time will pass and they will be grown up with children of their own. Thank you Lord for the blessing of children and granchildren in our lives.

A Sunday blog

I have not figured out if Sunday is a day where we just naturally feel blue because in our growing up years it was a day just for family and now it seems like it has become something way different. When Monty was gone I just assumed I felt blue because I was here really by myself, but even with him home, it seems like a lonesome day. We had Mac's baby dedication at First Baptist Euless today and it was a special time of being with Beau, Cara, the two boys and Cara's dad and stepmom. Baby dedications bring to mind the desires you have for those small children and the blessed life you pray they will have, but I am reminded today of the child that I dedicated to the Lord in my womb and never, as far as I know, changed my mind about giving him wholly to the Lord. My heart breaks whenever I think of him and the decisions he has made and the life he has chosen and the estrangement of visiting with him as in the past. I know that I do not know the future and I do know that God tells us he is working all things together for good for those that love Him and are called for His purpose. Sometimes it is hard to imagine in our most grandiose visions how He will ever use this for His honor and glory. Sometimes there is just an ache for fellowship with someone that either cannot fellowship with you because of death or by their choice, and on days like today just makes it hard to accept. I know tomorrow is a new day, that I am probably just tired and my God is sovereign and totally in control of my life wherever that may lead me. Holy Spirit, I pray that you empower me right now to have the faith I need to trust you to work this situation together for good.